I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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