Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
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