I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
