pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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