Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize