Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(573): View more from Missouri

I can tuck mytits in my pants

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(360): View more from Washington

is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?

(503): View more from Oregon

Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?

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(540): View more from Virginia

she looked like the before picture.

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(503): View more from Oregon

She wants to have naked weekends

(541): View more from Oregon

They call that free range vagina in France

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I just feel like everything is too perfect

(774): View more from Massachusetts

He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator

(774): View more from Massachusetts

Or both. Which is common

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(828): View more from North Carolina

Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"

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(720): View more from Colorado

Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand

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(218): View more from Minnesota

we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.

(270): View more from Kentucky

LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?

(218): View more from Minnesota

No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.

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