I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
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what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
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Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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