Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
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