Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"

  (314): View more from Missouri

  You fucking left with him didn't you?!

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  (636): At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand" (314): You fucking left with him didn't you?! http://tfl.nu/a3ou
  Replies (33) Good night (1763) Bad night (4054)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten

  (301): View more from Maryland

  so glad i banged her when she was skinny

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  (443): its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten (301): so glad i banged her when she was skinny http://tfl.nu/17dv
  Replies (18) Good night (3768) Bad night (941)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.

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  (310): the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him. http://tfl.nu/jidd
  Replies (27) Good night (7324) Bad night (1827)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.

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  (412): he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor. http://tfl.nu/z7yu
  Replies (34) Good night (11544) Bad night (1711)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.

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  (540): i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective. http://tfl.nu/c9ng
  Replies (3) Good night (3942) Bad night (942)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.

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  (714): if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed. http://tfl.nu/eogf
  Replies (3) Good night (3104) Bad night (1022)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love

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  (708): we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love http://tfl.nu/30hf
  Replies (17) Good night (6761) Bad night (1065)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.

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  (860): Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know. http://tfl.nu/9803
  Replies (5) Good night (887) Bad night (1435)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.

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  (865): I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it. http://tfl.nu/3j3f
  Replies (4) Good night (596) Bad night (1502)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS

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  (512): BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS http://tfl.nu/z5cf
  Replies (4) Good night (950) Bad night (1049)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.

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  (717): Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together. http://tfl.nu/4ceo
  Replies (6) Good night (1536) Bad night (557)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.

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  (314): You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex. http://tfl.nu/sc6l
  Replies (4) Good night (766) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?

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  (631): Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert? http://tfl.nu/xdif
  Replies (7) Good night (608) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.

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  (508): I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi. http://tfl.nu/i78a
  Replies (1) Good night (533) Bad night (297)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.

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  (306): I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic. http://tfl.nu/bsgj
  Replies (4) Good night (252) Bad night (498)

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