come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
honey bunches of taint.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
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Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
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Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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