The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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