do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
