It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Randomize
