I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
