so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
