Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
