he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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