Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
