# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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