their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
