My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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