i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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