I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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