i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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