apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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