He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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