nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
