Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
