I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
