You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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