:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I will be naked everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize