i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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