I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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