Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
We need to get me chipped asap
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
