this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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