the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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