school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
