You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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