We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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