you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
