thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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