new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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