This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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