Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Randomize
