Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Four minutes until I can fart!
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
