were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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