I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
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