Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize