Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
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