seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
i think i just lost a toe
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
