Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
he puts the penis in happiness.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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